EXT – AUSCHWITZ DEATH CAMP – NIGHT
A grey mist circles the dilapidated buildings as the wind whistles and howls.
INSERT – TITLE: “LADY GAGA PRESENTS”
C/U on PAIR OF HIGH-HEELED FEET as they walk down a dusty concrete floor (making a loud, crisp CLICK! With each step)
INSERT – TITLE: “OATMEAL”
LADY GAGA is standing in a large, darkened room. She is wearing high-waisted pants, a baggy, blue denim shirt and a ragged old hat perched on top of a large, white AFRO. She is also wearing BLACKFACE makeup. Standing behind GAGA are a group of buff, white MODEL-TYPES, wearing grimy dungarees (no shirt) and also in BLACKFACE.
LYRICS
Oh-oh-oh-oh!
Oh-oh-oh-oh!
As the beat kicks in, GAGA and the MODEL-TYPES start performing stylised MINSTREL-SHOW-esque dance moves (including shuffles and Jazz-hands)
VERSE
I want to say ‘I love you’
But you’re making it too hard
I want you to be healthy
But my feelings you discard
The MODEL-TYPES surround GAGA and writhe for a beat, then violently RIP her MINSTREL costume off, revealing a nude-coloured pantsuit with a SWASTIKA painted on one side, and a PENTAGRAM painted on the other. GAGA dances in a jerky way, as if having a seizure.
VERSE
I want you to be healthy,
I want you when you’re hot
I love it when you’re on the stove
Brewing in a pot
BRIDGE
Don’t be so bold,
Don’t be so honest,
I like it steamy like
A bowl of porridge
CHORUS
Oh-oh-oh-oh-Oatmeal!
Mix the oats with water,
Mix the oats with water,
Oh-oh-oh-oh-Oatmeal!
Like your Grandma taught ya,
Like your Grandma taught ya
GAGA is strutting down a corridor with the MODEL-TYPES following close behind snapping their fingers. GAGA is wearing a BURQA that covers her face, but is cut to reveal most of her skeletal, naked body underneath. She has 666 painted on her midriff in what appears to be blood. The MODEL-TYPES are clad in GIMP SUITS.
VERSE
My breakfast time is special and
I want a little treat
If I add a little honey my
Porridge gets so sweet
GAGA and MODEL-TYPES arrive in a DUNGEON where two men are chained to the wall. They are THE PROPHET MOHAMMED and JESUS. Also present are a NAKED WOMAN and a GOAT.
REPEAT CHORUS
CUT BETWEEN:
GAGA forces MOHAMMED and JESUS to make out while she watches sadistically
GAGA, wearing an NAZI SS OFFICER uniform, stabs a RABBI and laughs maniacally
GAGA takes a dump on a massive AMERICAN FLAG
GAGA sets an inverted CRUCIFIX on fire, thereby summoning SATAN
GAGA and SATAN slaughter the MODEL-TYPES taking turns to feast on their leather-clad carcasses.
GAGA looks up from one of their torsos –
OUTRO (spoken)
You know, I’m just like Goldilocks – I like my porridge juuuust riiight!
A grey mist circles the dilapidated buildings as the wind whistles and howls.
INSERT – TITLE: “LADY GAGA PRESENTS”
C/U on PAIR OF HIGH-HEELED FEET as they walk down a dusty concrete floor (making a loud, crisp CLICK! With each step)
INSERT – TITLE: “OATMEAL”
LADY GAGA is standing in a large, darkened room. She is wearing high-waisted pants, a baggy, blue denim shirt and a ragged old hat perched on top of a large, white AFRO. She is also wearing BLACKFACE makeup. Standing behind GAGA are a group of buff, white MODEL-TYPES, wearing grimy dungarees (no shirt) and also in BLACKFACE.
LYRICS
Oh-oh-oh-oh!
Oh-oh-oh-oh!
As the beat kicks in, GAGA and the MODEL-TYPES start performing stylised MINSTREL-SHOW-esque dance moves (including shuffles and Jazz-hands)
VERSE
I want to say ‘I love you’
But you’re making it too hard
I want you to be healthy
But my feelings you discard
The MODEL-TYPES surround GAGA and writhe for a beat, then violently RIP her MINSTREL costume off, revealing a nude-coloured pantsuit with a SWASTIKA painted on one side, and a PENTAGRAM painted on the other. GAGA dances in a jerky way, as if having a seizure.
VERSE
I want you to be healthy,
I want you when you’re hot
I love it when you’re on the stove
Brewing in a pot
BRIDGE
Don’t be so bold,
Don’t be so honest,
I like it steamy like
A bowl of porridge
CHORUS
Oh-oh-oh-oh-Oatmeal!
Mix the oats with water,
Mix the oats with water,
Oh-oh-oh-oh-Oatmeal!
Like your Grandma taught ya,
Like your Grandma taught ya
GAGA is strutting down a corridor with the MODEL-TYPES following close behind snapping their fingers. GAGA is wearing a BURQA that covers her face, but is cut to reveal most of her skeletal, naked body underneath. She has 666 painted on her midriff in what appears to be blood. The MODEL-TYPES are clad in GIMP SUITS.
VERSE
My breakfast time is special and
I want a little treat
If I add a little honey my
Porridge gets so sweet
GAGA and MODEL-TYPES arrive in a DUNGEON where two men are chained to the wall. They are THE PROPHET MOHAMMED and JESUS. Also present are a NAKED WOMAN and a GOAT.
REPEAT CHORUS
CUT BETWEEN:
GAGA forces MOHAMMED and JESUS to make out while she watches sadistically
GAGA, wearing an NAZI SS OFFICER uniform, stabs a RABBI and laughs maniacally
GAGA takes a dump on a massive AMERICAN FLAG
GAGA sets an inverted CRUCIFIX on fire, thereby summoning SATAN
GAGA and SATAN slaughter the MODEL-TYPES taking turns to feast on their leather-clad carcasses.
GAGA looks up from one of their torsos –
OUTRO (spoken)
You know, I’m just like Goldilocks – I like my porridge juuuust riiight!
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